Cobwebs

I’m trying to find a way to make this funny. Ever since I had my knee replacement, my husband is obsessed with housework – cobwebs mostly.

Actually, he freely admits that until I was away from home for three weeks, he never noticed them before. Believe me, that is not because they were not there. It’s just that we live in the country, amidst spiders and such. Ya knock ‘em down, they build ‘em back. No big deal.

Until now. When I was in rehab he began noticing things like dust and cobwebs. He figured out a system to make cleaning the kitchen easier. (This you will not find me complaining about.) Dishwashers were foreign objects to him. Now our dishwasher is his friend.

This could be funny. He went to Lowe’s and bought a 12- foot pole to attach to the vacuum so he could reach the high ceilings. One night he cleaned them all down then took a flashlight the next morning and located the offenders. He killed at least half-dozen grandmother spiders. They are not large enough to be grandfather spiders. This is why this is not funny: He hates our home and where we are living. At a time when I most need to be settled in my life, he is in such an uproar that he actually said, out loud, “How did two people ever get themselves into such a tragic situation.”

-- Tragic? I asked.

-- Yes. This is a tragedy.

I walked out of the room, thinking This man is not only demented, he is a fool.

Dementia is so much more than memory loss.

And the last thing dementia is, is funny.